Nada: Europe. Dear Mom.

January 10, 2007

I would like to go back there. It's a sweet place. Very poor and very bored. I think I need more spicy lemonade. And I've downloaded too many "Hits of the 90's". 

Let me tell you a secret: Kelly Clarkson's song, "Because of You" makes me cry like a baby. It makes me think about my mother in the worst way. I hate that women in the worst way. The same way I love her. I haven't seen or spoken to her in...2 years? I hear she pretty much has altzheimer's...I secretly hope she has forgotten me...I wish I could forget her. I secretly wish I would get a phone call telling me that she is dead...Isn't that horrible? What's worse is that I want a tattoo of her. There's a picture of her when she was probably about 14 or 15 standing next to a tree holding a cat. In my memory she looks so happy. I don't know if that's actually the case. I want that picture so badly. Forever.

love, 
J.